Learn how to be easy to talk to if you’re an introvert so you can have the kinds of friends you want. As an introvert, it can be tough for you to be in a social setting for a long period of time. Unlike extroverts, introverts get drained whenever they’re around too many people for far too long. They’re only able to recharge when they’re in a place of solitude, like the confines and comforts of their own home.
However, that doesn’t mean introverts can’t socialize. Far from it. They’re simply the type who goes home first during a party compared to most extroverts who are more than happy to stay the night. If you’re an introvert who wants to make friends and build meaningful friendships, learn how to be easy to talk to. You can do that by paying attention to the following tips.
If talking isn’t your strong suit, then just listen. Pay attention to the person speaking to you. Sometimes, that’s all it takes for a person to be good at a conversation. If you’re a great listener and the other person realizes that, they’ll be very comfortable with you. They’ll see you as a person who’s easy to talk to even if you’re an introvert.
Master the art of listening from here on out. Don’t only listen to a person’s words but also understand the emotion they’re trying to convey. Let your body language express that you’re paying attention to the other person by slighting leaning into them, keeping your eyes on them, and nodding your head every so often.
One key thing to keep in mind so you can be an attentive listener is to actually be curious about somebody. Train your mind to be curious every time you’re in conversation with someone. Be immersed in their stories. Want to know what they are like. If you can train your mind to do this, you’ll become an active listener very naturally.
Open-mindedness is key in a lot of social interactions. You need to understand that the world is a very diverse place. As you meet people, you’ll find a lot of them with different opinions, world views, and beliefs. Just because theirs doesn’t align with yours, that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy having a conversation with them.
Remain respectful and open-minded. If someone says something that’s against your opinions and beliefs, still listen to them so you can understand how they got to believe the things they believe. You don’t need to spark up a debate, but you can engage in a thought-provoking and intelligent conversation.
Practice appearing being more approachable
Simply appear approachable and you’re already on your way to being easy to talk to, whether you’re an introvert or not. Wear the appearance of an approachable person and people will naturally approach you. They’ll find your appearance calming and your presence calm.
To do this, try to be as presentable as you can be. Maintain proper hygiene, care about how you look in public, be neat and clean, and be decent. Don’t slouch. That will make you appear unconfident and distant.
It will also serve you well to be as friendly as you can to everyone you meet, even when you’re not about to be in a conversation with them. A passing smile or a nod to someone you come across wherever you go is more than enough.
Practice these things until they become somewhat of a second nature to you. The more approachable you appear, the easier people will find it to talk to you.
Know your limit
Considering you’re an introvert, you already know that there’s a limit to your social battery. Don’t force yourself to stay at a party longer than you can stomach. If you can feel yourself waning and wanting to come home, listen to your instinct and go home. Relax and reward yourself for trying to socialize.
If you keep forcing yourself to break your limit despite not wanting to, you’ll end up hating this whole process. There’s no need to change who you are. That’s not what this is about. Our goal here is to be easy to talk to if you’re an introvert so you can build meaningful friendships, not masquerade as an extrovert.
If it is your willful decision to attempt to push your limits ever so slightly, then that’s your prerogative. A handful of minutes more than you can tolerate each time so you can naturally build your tolerance up. If that’s what you want, then that’s fine too. Just remember to never push yourself too much to the point that you begin hating the entire process. This can damage your mental health, which is the last thing you want to do.
Receive assistance from your friends
You don’t need to do this process alone. The friends you already have know should be able to help you. All you need to do is ask them.
That said, tell your friends about your goal to be easier to talk to. If that friend has known you enough, then they’ll already know about your introversion quite well. Your friends will even appreciate the idea of you trying to better yourself socially.
Whether your friend is also an introvert or an extrovert, you will be able to learn a lot from both. Get perspective from them. Ask how they usually handle conversations, whether with people they know or with strangers and apply everything you’ve learned in your personal experiences moving forward.
Find a commonality
A person will find you easy to talk to if you have things in common. Conversely, you’ll be able to pay attention to the other person much more naturally for the same reason. Therefore, it will serve you immensely to find a person who has a lot in common with you or to simply just find a commonality with whomever it is you’re going to interact with.
Simply mention the things you enjoy and your interests whenever you’re in conversation with someone. At some point, you’re going to hit the bullseye and land on a commonality. Once this happens, the conversation should flow much more naturally.
Reciprocate during conversations
Even though one of the best things you can do in a conversation to be easy to talk to is to be a good listener, that doesn’t mean you should reciprocate. Contribute and add value to the conversation by reciprocating. Talk to them as they also talk to you. Share things with them as they also share things with you.
Keeping a curious mind can help with this too. If you’re curious about somebody, you’ll want to know as much as you can about them. Each time you come up with a question to ask, don’t hesitate to do so. Ask to learn and learn to connect.
It is also good to ask people open-ended questions. This will allow them to answer more thoroughly. Remember these things and every conversation you’ll have with someone you can connect with will become easy. The person you’ll be talking to will find you easy to talk to.
Learn to appreciate the company of others
As mentioned already, as an introvert, you’re more likely to get energized being alone or with a handful of close friends while at home rather than out and about with people you don’t really know. However, our goal now is to be easy to talk to if you’re an introvert and you’ll never be able to do that if you don’t learn to appreciate the company of others.
That said, begin looking at the bright side and actually enjoy and appreciate the company of others. Whenever you’re talking to somebody, keep in mind that they could be doing anything else right now, but instead, they’re talking to you. They could withhold from sharing things about their life, but they’re choosing to share them with you. Appreciate that and you’ll be more attentive to the other person, making you easier to talk to for them.
Open Up Gradually
When others are opening up to you, you also should open up to them. Depending on your personality and background, opening up can either be easy or immensely tough for you. Be that as it may, it should be noted that two people opening up to one another is a form of trust. That trust is highly beneficial to you if you want to be seen as a person who’s easy to talk to.
You don’t need to tell others every single thing about you. Just open up enough things that they can get a clear picture of who you are. Don’t be a closed book. Be open and welcoming. Share certain things about your life and the person you’re talking to will appreciate you opening up to them.
Find out what your strengths and weaknesses are, socially
Everybody has strengths and weaknesses and this can also be applied to a person’s social life. Even the most socially adept people have things they can’t excel at during a social setting. For example, a person can be the greatest storyteller, but perhaps they’re not the funniest person in the room.
That said, find out what your strengths are. If you’ve always been naturally funny, use that. If you’re a great listener, then be a good listener. Whatever it is, take advantage of it whenever you’re engaging with someone in conversation. If you use your strengths, you’ll be a better conversationalist, thus making you a person who’s easier to talk to.
Don’t avoid extroverts
An introvert and an extrovert may sit on the opposite ends of one spectrum, but a friendship between the two can be one of the most natural things in the world. Just because you’re an introvert, that doesn’t automatically restrict you to only befriend other introverts. Never avoid extroverts. You’ll learn a lot of things from them as well, and they should also be able to learn a lot of things from you.
If you’re diverse enough and you’re willing to speak to virtually anyone, your reputation as a good conversationalist will grow. Just keep an open mind and allow yourself to converse with anyone, regardless of their personality spectrum.
Treat it as a learning experience
Treat every conversation as a learning experience. Better yet, treat this entire thing as a journey experience. In your attempts to be easy to talk to, you will meet a lot of people with different stories and experiences. Learn from them. Take the things you’re learning and use them to be better, not only socially, but also personally.
Seeing this whole thing as a learning experience will make you look forward to each interaction. This will make you actually want to go through this even more so than you already did. If you found it difficult in the past, take heed of this advice and things will become easier for you moving forward. This will then make you become easier to talk to since this is something you actually look forward to doing.
Only go to places you’re comfortable with
Your environment can play a massive role in your behavior. That said, only go to places that you’re comfortable with. If you’re at a place you find icky or way too distant from your liking, you’ll only tense up and you’ll never be able to pay attention to the person you’re speaking to.
Being in places you’re uncomfortable with is even harder for you as an introvert. Just make things easier for yourself by being in places you’re comfortable and familiar with.
This is the most important thing of all. Just have fun! Know why you’re doing this and understand the results this process can bear. I know it will be difficult for you as of now, but if you keep doing this enough, you’ll eventually be easy to talk to even if you’re an introvert. The goal will have been attained and your ability to flourish friendships will become much more natural.
Look forward to the end result and have fun during the process. You’re still building yourself up, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re doing the wonderful act of mingling with other individuals. That’s a beautiful thing right there. Acknowledge that fact and just keep going.
To be easy to talk to if you’re an introvert can take time, but it will be immensely worth it. Every once in a while, you may start to feel like giving up if your mind just can’t get the hang of being easy to talk to. However, never ever fret. Keep persisting and you’ll eventually arrive at your desired destination.
If you want more assistance on how to be better at conversations, or improve your social skills, or even deal with various social anxiety issues, be sure to read up on the other articles we have on this site. They can be just as helpful to you as this article is. Just keep on learning and eventually, you’ll be socially skilled enough to get the friends you want.