I wanted to get your attention on an important reason why people become lonely and isolated. Individualism is making us more lonely.
This is not necessarily about social skills; it’s about buying into the individualism idea… a little too much.
As a society, I think we cherish individualism and heroism too much. As I say in my book, this is in our culture, and it’s over-blown by the stories we hear and the movies we watch.
And this hurts our social lives
This over-individualistic thinking leads to beliefs like… “I can build a great life, and I can do it on my own; I don’t need any help” and “No one can stop me from achieving my greatest potential”
These beliefs are great, unless you go too far in that direction.
You just can’t create ‘happiness’ on your own. In fact, much of our happiness comes from being with other people, friends, lovers, and family. Dozens and dozens of scientific studies prove that.
You can be successful on your own, but it’s much easier to be successful when you connect with other people.
If you have the right friends, you get more motivated, your problems seem easier to handle, you’re more informed, you get more help on your specific situation, you get more connections, you have more fun, and you no longer feel lonely.
It’s just crazy to pretend that when people succeed, they did it on their own, with no help, from no one.
For your success AND for your happiness, you need others people. It’s not a weakness, it’s just human nature.
Don’t let others bully you into believing that you’re weak if you can’t rely a 100% on your own on everything.
Until next time, I wish you lots of luck.
– Paul Sanders