To text someone you haven’t interacted with in a while can come with challenges. Depending on why you stopped talking to each other in the first place, this process can either be very easy or very difficult. Whatever the case, no matter how difficult it may be, the most important thing to know now is that it is indeed possible for as long as your intention is pure.
Having said that, if there’s a friend you’ve lost contact with and you want to get in touch with them again, follow these 10 tips on how to text someone you haven’t talked to in a while.
Think of why you want to reconnect with them
When people lose touch with another, there’s always a reason behind it. It doesn’t have to be a bad one, it can be as simple as only having so many things to handle at that particular time. Still, it’s important to know why you want to reach out to them because it will eventually be brought up when you both start talking again.
It’s possible to start talking again as if you both haven’t talked for a long time. It’s usually when they believe you may have important things to work on, just as much as they do, and that they don’t mind getting close with you again. But it’s always better to know the reason and be honest about it, so you’ll be able to assess if it’s a selfish or genuine one.
If it’s for a selfish reason, you may have to consider finding an alternative that won’t waste anybody’s time. They will be able to sense it at some point, which will only make them feel used. If you’re genuine, make sure to bring up your reason to them—it will be appreciated. The sooner you do it, the better.
Consider the last conversation you had with them
If you haven’t exactly figured out why you want to reconnect them, find out on which platform you’ve last texted each other. Reread the conversation you’ve had with them to get fully and accurately reminded of what last happened, instead of only relying on your memories. Has it ended in a good way? Or in a bad way?
If it has ended in a bad way, it’s more likely that they will not respond back to you. At least not yet. If you think the situation will become better with an apology and a middle ground, you will have to start with that
If necessary, apologize
This is only if the reason why you and your friend lost touch is because of a disagreement or an argument of some kind. If you were somehow at fault with that, let them know how genuinely sorry you are and that you want to reconnect with them.
A sincere apology is a powerful tool and is often the only missing thing to form a lost connection to a rekindled friendship.
You may want to start slow
Since you and the other person have not talked to in a while, it may serve you better to start things slow instead of giving them an overload of information all at once. Start with your casual small talk: how they’re doing, how’s work, the family, and everything else in between. Let them know how you’re doing too.
To text someone you haven’t spoken with in a while and have that be meaningful, you have to start slow and build your way up. Don’t rush things.
Focus on how they’re doing instead of how you’re doing
When you text someone you haven’t talked to in a while for the sake of re-establishing a friendship with them, make sure you lean the conversation on them instead of yourself. Ask how they’re doing instead of blabbering on about what’s been happening in your life.
Ask with sincerity and respond with delight if things are going well for them. Let them know you’re happy for them. They will highly appreciate it.
Consider asking open-ended questions
If you want to text someone you haven’t talked to in a while and want that conversation to be meaningful, make sure your questions are all open-ended. Open-ended questions are ones the other person can’t just answer with a “yes” or a “no.”
For example, instead of asking “Are you okay?”, you can ask “How are things going?” so they can give a more thought-out answer instead of just saying yes or no. This is just one example. Formulate questions of your own and make sure they’re questions they can comfortably answer.
Text them on special occasions
An easy way of texting someone you haven’t spoken to in a while is to text them during a special occasion. That way, you’ll have a good reason to reconnect with them and you can simply use that opportunity to attempt to go back to the way things were.
Make sure the occasion is something significant to them. If you’re texting them during an occasion that is of no value to them, you might as well just text them any other day.
This is something you can do once you’ve already texted that someone and the conversation have already progressed for a little bit. Sending them photos of anything of importance is a way of building up that conversation and refamiliarizing yourselves with one another.
Just to reiterate, make sure the pictures you’re sending them are something important. For example, if you’ve gone to a place you both have discussed in the past and you have a photo of that, send it. If you’ve recently gotten a new pet, send a picture of that. Make sure these images bring value to the conversation.
Remind them of good memories
Reminiscing is the easiest way to rekindle old friendships. This is something you absolutely must do when you text someone you want to re-establish a connection with. It doesn’t have to be overly dramatic, it just has to be meaningful.
Remind them of the good times you’ve spent with one another and why you guys were so close in the past. This is also a good reminder to the both of you that your friendship has value and that you can still go back to the way things were.
Set up a meeting
Finally, you can only text someone for so long before it becomes tedious. If you really want to reconnect with someone, you can’t simply do this through texts. To let them know you really want to be friends with them again, know when to stop texting and when to start actually hanging out again.
Text someone you haven’t talked to in a while only if you really want to be friends with them again and when your intention is sincere. No matter how things ended in the past, it can always be fixed as long as you’re willing. The act of texting someone to reconnect may sound informal, but that’s just how things are in the current world.
Simply follow the tips above and make sure that you’re approaching this with sincerity and kindness. You can rekindle your friendship just by beginning it with a single text. Be sure to do it soon.