Sometimes, it can be hard to be fun all of a sudden after a long day of work. In this article, I’ll show you how you can be more fun and funny to be around. Switching on that fun part of you is a skill, and you can learn it.
One thing you have to know about being more fun is that not everyone can do it naturally. A lot of people tend to be more fun around other people because of their upbringing. These people were surrounded by a lot of friends growing up and they were able to learn from others at a young age.
Not everyone has this kind of experience, though. We all have different upbringings and yours and mine are different from everybody else’s. If you weren’t exposed to this kind of personality early on, there is a good chance that you don’t have it as an adult.
Thankfully, it is something that you can develop. And that’s what we’re going to be tackling today. In this article, you are going to learn how to be more fun to be around and what skills you need to develop to be the most fun person in the room. So fun that everyone will want to be friends with you.
1. Develop Your Wit
Your wit is your necessary weapon in the world of socializing. The wittier you are, the more successful you will be in social gatherings in terms of building friendships. Your wit is your ability to think on your feet and your capability to respond as snappy as possible. Doing this will impress others and draw them towards you.
Let’s say you’re in a social event surrounded by many people. Someone approaches you with a positive outlook so you know the interaction is going to be light. You’re going to want to keep up that positivity by being as quick as you can in that interaction. As soon as the other person finishes commenting or saying something, you need to respond intellectually as fast as possible.
The best way to do this is to be an active listener. Don’t just listen to the words itself, but also pick up on the meaning behind the story or the point that they’re telling. Listen very closely to the person you’re talking to and watch out for highlights that you can comment on later. It’s also a bonus if you can add humor to your responses. They’ll immediately see you as a fun person if you’re able to make them laugh in a heartbeat.
For example, someone approaches you and starts small talk. Let’s say they start talking about the weather. Imagine it’s summer and it’s been hotter than usual during the day. If they comment on that, respond with something along the lines of “It’s been so hot lately, I almost wish American Airlines had flights to Antarctica”. It’s an absurd sentiment, but you’re responding to their small talk with a fun approach. If you can say something like this quickly, other people will see you as someone fun to be around.
2. Know A Lot Of Jokes
If you want to be fun to be around, you’re going to need to equip jokes in your arsenal. If you have jokes ready to tell at any given time, you will never have to worry about having nothing to say at all.
You can browse the web on funny jokes to tell your friends or go to video streaming sites like YouTube and look up stand-up comedians. They always have the best jokes and you can use them as inspiration for your upcoming social gathering.
Before you start telling any jokes, though, you need to know your audience first. You need to be sure you don’t tell jokes that will offend people. They might mistake you for someone insensitive rather than someone funny. You don’t want that. Stay in the safe zone and tell jokes that can’t be seen as offensive. Don’t say a joke about other people’s race or sexual orientation.
Instead, you can say jokes about current events, ridiculous stories, you can even joke about the other people at the party. You can comment on how they look, what they’re wearing, their choices of food and drinks, but not their race or sexual orientation.
3. Research, Study, And Practice
You need to take time in crafting your skills by researching and studying. Also, you’ll need to take an incredible amount of time practicing at home. You need to practice to a certain degree that it becomes natural for you. The more you practice, the more you’ll learn. The more you’ll learn, the more naturally funny you’ll end up being.
As mentioned earlier, you can go ahead and look up stand-up comedians online and use them as inspirations. Not only are they good sources of funny jokes to tell, but you can also observe their behavior, body language, and optimism on stage.
Look at how confident and cheerful they are when they are telling their jokes, even when some of the jokes have negative undertones. They are appearing positive and the crowd loves it. You should be the same when you are telling your jokes in front of your friends. The more positive you are, the more they will be drawn into you.
Another group of people that you can look into for references are talk show hosts. They have conversations with people for a living and they have to constantly be entertaining to stay relevant. They may not have jokes as funny as the ones said by comedians, but they entertain their guests and crowd more actively.
These groups of people are very good research materials for you if you’re eager to be more fun to be around. Learn what you can and practice thoroughly at home. You can practice telling your jokes in front of a mirror so you can see your facial expressions and body language as you’re talking. This may seem odd or even ridiculous at first but you need to practice and practice until it becomes a part of you. Once that happens, it will never go away for your system.
4. Don’t Be Ashamed To Tell Embarrassing Stories
You can also choose to pick up from personal experiences when being funny instead of just telling random jokes. You allowing yourself to open up and share your own experiences also shows security and confidence. You’re secured with yourself that you’re allowing other people to know your stories and your confidence is a sign of being socially adept. You are more fun to be around if you adopt these traits.
Giving your input after someone shares a story is a great opportunity to do this. For example, if someone shares their experience with anything at all, you can then proceed to tell your own story about the same scenario, with added humor. It’s better to do this when you had the experience. You can lie, but that can come back to bite you later on. The story you’ll tell will also flow more naturally if the story is an actual personal experience.
Just be sure you don’t overdo this factor and share something incredibly personal. You’ll appear more of a creep than someone open and fun. Just keep it to a minor, and of course, humorous embarrassing moments and the people around you should be laughing their heads off with you as their jester.
5. Develop Emotional Intelligence
Another way to be fun to be around is by having emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is a person’s capability to recognize their own and other’s emotions. You need to be able to pick up on what the person is feeling and how they’re thinking and react accordingly to that. People will appreciate and enjoy your company more if you do this.
There are many things that you have to consider if you want to have emotional intelligence. But most importantly, you’ll need to have the empathy to hit the nail. You need to be able to put yourself in the shoes of someone else. This will make you understand them better, and thus interact with them better.
For example, if someone you’re speaking to seems dull and inactive, your empathetic nature will let you know that the other person must not be in a positive mood. Before moving forward with anything else, you can ask them about it. You can be a source of reassurance. You can then direct the interaction into something more light-hearted and positive. They will appreciate you for not only listening to their words but also picking up on their emotions.
There’s a fine line between being emotionally intelligent and psychoanalyzing and you shouldn’t cross that line. Psychoanalyzing means to “reading a person” and “looking inside their heads” and commenting on it. Essentially, being emotionally intelligent shows that you can put yourself in the position of others, but psychoanalyzing means going inside their heads.
People don’t want this because it makes them feel vulnerable and it seems like you’re invading their privacy. It makes you seem over-aggressive. Just be a friendly figure and just ask them if they’re okay if you sense that they’re not feeling okay. Don’t attempt to read their minds.
6. Ask Questions
You need to be more interactive in social situations and one great way to do this is by asking questions. Whenever someone is telling a story to you and you feel like it can still be expanded upon, ask a question to further the conversation. If there’s a thought in your head that you feel like they have the answer to, ask the question.
Asking questions also shows attentiveness. If you’re an attentive person, you’re more fun to have around. It puts in their head that you will always listen when they are speaking to you, and thus they will feel more comfortable being in a conversation with you.
Just be sure to ask questions that are relevant and are actually in line with their stories or whatever it is they’re talking about. If you ask questions that have nothing to do with the topic at hand, you will seem distracted. I’ve mentioned earlier how helpful it can be to be an active listener and that works just as well in this scenario.
You can also actively ask questions with the purpose of letting them show off their knowledge. If you’re in a discussion about a certain topic and you know one of your friends knows a lot about it, let them voice out by asking them.
For example, you end up talking about a certain country and you know a friend who’s been there and knows a lot about it. You can say something like “Hey my friend Jerry has been to Japan and has done a lot of research on it. What did you think about your last visit to Japan, Jerry?”.
By doing this, you’re letting them in on the conversation and allowing them to shine. They will unconsciously feel thankful to you and will have more fun being around you from then on.
7. Appreciate Others’ Attempts At Being More Fun
When someone else is telling a funny joke, don’t be ashamed to laugh. Even if you know no one in that scenario, so long as you are part of the circle. This makes the person telling the joke to feel satisfied and more confident. By also doing this, you’re being polite and is interacting with the speaker. Most likely, when you tell a joke of your own, the other person will do you the same courtesy and laugh too.
Just make sure your laughs are timed correctly. Don’t laugh when the situation is inappropriate. Some people respond with laughter on impulse when being spoken to and they weren’t listening in the first place. Don’t do this. Listen to the person speaking and when they say something funny, laugh. You will feel the impulse to do so anyway if what they say is funny. Just allow yourself to burst out. The one who told the joke will find comfort in that and will be more inclined to be your friend.
8. Don’t Be Afraid To Banter
In social interactions, when someone makes a comment or a joke on your account, there’s already a sense of camaraderie going on there. Don’t get mad when someone says something funny about you. This can just mean they are only playful. What you should do instead of being upset is to counter them with your comment. You banter instead of being upset and the atmosphere will become even more interesting.
Being good at banter is another sign of being witty, and everyone loves to be around a witty person. There are two ways of going about in moments of banter. You can try to win, or you can surrender but still feel like a winner. You can win by, of course, bantering better. If someone makes a joke on what you’re wearing, insult theirs too. They make fun of how you dress, find a flaw in how they dress as well.
But if you really can’t beat them on an exchange, acknowledge that fact by saying something like “Okay, you’re good at this. You win”. By doing this, you’re being the better person for letting them win. It also shows you’re mature enough to acknowledge when someone is more skillful than you at something.
Be sure to keep all of this on the level of playful. Every single tease should just be that; a tease. Don’t mean what you say or else it won’t be fun anymore. Even if someone says something hurtful to you, don’t make the situation worse by being upset and saying something awful.
You should still respond with a witty tease and you’ll be seen as someone mature and witty. People will want to be around you more if you’re able to receive jokes with such a calm approach.
The level of your comments should also always depend on your closeness with the other person. You wouldn’t want to insult someone you just met the same way you’d insult a close friend. However, if someone you just met says something horrible about you, then you have the permission to bring them down harder. But again, always keep it in the spirit of being playful. Don’t get too personal and maintain a fun atmosphere.
9. Be Grateful For Socializing
Another great tip if you want to be fun around is to feel grateful whenever you’re socializing. Be happy to have the opportunity to meet and socialize with others. Think it until you mean it, and you’ll start internalizing it. If you feel happy in a social gathering, your positivity will skyrocket. You’ll be more joyful and your facial expressions and body language will show it.
One way to make this work is to question yourself the reason for all of this. Why do you want to be more fun to be around? What is your purpose for being a better social person? It’s because you want to make friends and socialize better, isn’t it? If that’s what you want and you’re put in a situation where you can socialize, wouldn’t that make you happy? It should and you should start feeling that way in every social interaction. Trust me, you’ll act more naturally if your mood is positive.
Keeping this in mind, if your mood is negative, just try to stay at home instead of going out. If it’s something you can’t force, stay in or at least avoid socializing in the meantime. Consider those your downtimes, which you are allowed to have, and just make up for the lost time when you recover.
10. Cheer People Up With Your Positivity
When someone is feeling down, needs advice, and wants a pleasant company, they’ll want to be with someone who can give out great advice. Being fun to be around doesn’t just mean you’re a funny guy, it also means you’re wise and is capable of giving out helpful advice. They will appreciate you if you can give advice and prefer your company over others. You can be fun to be around by being someone they can rely on.
Friends aren’t just people who laugh with each other, they also help each other in bad times. That’s the kind of friend you want to be if you want to be a positive presence. People encounter problems regularly; on family, relationships, or their careers. Sometimes, they just want people who can be there with them until the situation gets better.
Loneliness is a terrible thing but a positive person can help defeat that. You need to be that person. And you can be that kind of person by giving them helpful advice on their situation. Even if it’s a bit of simple advice, a person who’s going through a rough patch can have a hard time figuring out things on their own. That’s where you come in to help them. You need to remind them that there’s a fun world out there. It’s your goal to help bring them back into that world.
Of course, when accompanying or consoling a friend who’s feeling down, you can also do your best to make them laugh to make them forget their problems temporarily. Apply what you learned from comedians and talk show hosts. Make the situation lighter by saying a few light-hearted things. But you also need to know what to do in every situation. If the situation calls for serious action, you should also respond to it seriously.
11. Bring Some Warmth
Always maintain an air of positivity. People will lean more on those who are cheerful and positive and you should be that kind of person. When you’re happy, you’re warm. That warmth will draw people closer to you.
I will list a couple of ways that you can follow to be a warmer presence and brief reasons as to why they do so, just so you can understand the process better.
- Dress well – If you have a decent wardrobe, people will find you a lot more approachable. You don’t need to be the sharpest dresser in the room, you just need to look decent.
- Groom yourself constantly – If you look after yourself, it shows that you have self-respect. People will respect you if you respect yourself. This can also be helpful for your behavior because if you look good, you feel good. If you feel good, you’ll act more positively.
- Look people in the eyes when in conversation with them – You need to show others that you have their full focus when you’re interacting with each other. They are more inclined to interact with you again if they know you pay attention to them.
- Smile – You need to learn to smile more and always smile naturally. Treat your smile as a sign that you’re a friendly person. It will show that you’re the approachable type and that you will always bring more fun to the table.
- Always be polite and courteous – This is an essential rule if you want to be a warm presence. If you’re polite and courteous, then you’re a pleasant company. People will always like having you around.
Take time to take in all of this and apply them to your personality everywhere you go. Once it will become natural, you will automatically become a warm presence at every single social interaction. Your presence will be wanted by others and you will be more fun to be around.
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Enjoy this process
Your goal is to be funnier or to be a more fun presence. You should also have fun in the process. Don’t treat this task as a job, treat this as a hobby.
In this process, you’re going to be learning a lot of things on not just how to be more fun, but also on socializing. You will also discover a lot of things about yourself that you didn’t know you were capable of. Treat each discovery as wonders and you’ll find just how fun this task can be. If you were very upbeat growing up but something happened and you’ve forgotten how to have fun, you will rediscover them on this journey.
You need to know that you’re doing this not just because you want others to have fun around you, but also because you want to be happier yourself. By making genuine friendships, you are securing a future that’s filled with good company and that is very healthy for you.
You also need to know that this process doesn’t and won’t happen overnight. This will take time. So cherish that time. Have fun with it and you’ll get there in no time. You’ll be the most fun person you can be.
Your behavior is a reflection of your personality. If you behave like a fun person, it indicates a positive personality.
You are on your way to becoming someone with great social skills if you want to be a more fun person. It means you care about what people feel when they’re around you. With time, practice, and trial, you can achieve this goal. If you want to get there faster, you can read my eBook, Get The Friends You Want. Consider it your toolbox for overcoming loneliness and shyness, social skills, conversation, making friends, and building your social circle.