If you’re an introvert, then it’s not easy for you to socialize and make friends. For others, it seems so natural. But for you… it can feel weird and awkward, and sometimes feels like you’re forcing yourself to do it.
It feels that way for most introverts because they try and imitate the ways extroverted people use to socialize and connect with friends…
And it doesn’t work. It’s just not natural to act like somebody you’re not.
In this Social Skills Newsletter, I want to share with you how you can avoid socializing like an extrovert, which doesn’t work for you… and what you can do instead, to be able to connect with new friends.
But, before we can get into this, if you’re tired of a hit-and-miss social life, and you’re ready to get all the fun that a rich social life can give you, then I recommend that you get yourself a copy of my ebook, here:
Why It’s Easier For An Extrovert To Make Friends
Extroverts find it easy to make friends, because they are interested in a variety of subjects, and can spend a lot of time talking and socializing.
On the other hand, if you’re an introvert, you may tend to think more. You maybe like to reflect on stuff and find deeper meaning. You also like to rely on yourself to get things done and achieve your goals.
You also can’t socialize for longer periods of time. For an extrovert, spending three days in a row with friends might feel energizing. For you, that drains your energy.
If you’re an introvert, you need time for yourself.
Extroverts aren’t like you. They need to talk to think. Talking allows them to clarify their minds.
Sometimes, an extrovert would tell you something, then take it back a minute later. That’s because they tend to talk about what goes on in their minds, to be able to think about it better.
If you are interested in a set of subjects, you maybe go deeper with them and analyze details. Extroverts tend to get interested in a variety of subjects, that’s why they can relate to more people, and therefore, make friends easily.
How to Get The Friends You Want, while Staying Naturally Introverted
So, if introverts are different, they need to socialize in a different way. Here are some tips to keep in mind:
Tip #1 – Quality, not Quantity
Most networking advice doesn’t work. Especially if it tells you to connect with as many people as you can, and gather a huge pile of business cards, a long list of phone numbers, or 5000 facebook friends you never meet.
If you’re an introvert, focus on fewer people, but connect in a deeper way.
Spend more time getting to know a handful of people. If you focus on meeting 5 to 8 friends regularly, that’s more than enough. Eventually, you’ll lose some of them, and keep only the best matches for you.
Tip #2 – Don’t like to talk about yourself? You don’t have to!
…at least not at first.
Use your ability to focus and ask more precise questions to the people you meet. That will show them that you’re actually interested in them, and encourage them to spend more time with you.
Always share your opinion on what is being discussed; that’s important. But it doesn’t have to be specifically about YOU.
Tip #3 – Give yourself time to breathe
Being an introvert, you NEED time for yourself.
If you go out and meet friends twice a week, that’s great. You don’t need to go out everyday. And people can easily get used to the fact that you’re not always around.
And they will want to spend time with you anyway… especially if you follow Tip#4…
Tip #4 – Be Patient (wait… what?)
Oh, I know you hate to wait. Most of us do.
If you need time before you can totally open up to people, then there is something important you need to know.
If you’re not opening up to people right away, they won’t try harder to get to know you. You either want to connect, or not.
But that’s not a problem, if you KNOW about it.
If you also know that people have a million distractions in their lives, you’d understand that it’s SO EASY for them to forget about you.
Don’t take it personally, it’s normal. If you’re not showing up every time they meet with friends, they’re not gonna make a huge effort to contact you and make sure you come… at least, not when they’re just getting to know you.
They already have a zillion things they need to remember and they’re not getting around to any of that.
So. You need to remind people that you exist by contacting them more often.
Now, these 4 tips should get you way ahead of most introverts…
…but if you want to minimize the social mistakes, to the point that you can easily socialize and have fun, make friends, whether they’re introverted like you, or not, then you need to go get yourself a trial copy of my “Get The Friends You Want” eBook.
In it, I’ll share with you advanced techniques on how to make friends, even if you are introverted, and don’t like to spend all your time with people. I’ll also show you how to manage your social life in easy steps that won’t require a lot of “work.”
This book is the best way for you to make some interesting new friends, and you can start using the tips and techniques – and see results – IMMEDIATELY.
I’m so confident my eBook will improve your success in making friends, I’ll let you give it a try for 60 days. For more info, go right here:
I’ll talk to you again, real soon,
– Paul Sanders
Author, Get The Friends You Want